There is a big commotion over the matter of the house fire. 

I stay in the hospital for several days due to the excessive stress and respiratory damage caused by the fire, and my family comes during this period, including Mingyi.

When I wake up, it is already a day later. My mother is sitting next to me, wearing only house clothes and a thin jacket.

She has always paid attention to dignity and would never disgrace herself before others, so at first glance, I know that she had rushed here overnight when she was notified and gave no thought to changing clothes.

My eyes sting and I am about to call out to her, but she immediately notices I’m awake. A pair of gentle eyes redden at once, and she lays on top of me crying.

“A-Zhen, why are you so unlucky? It’s all because Mom is no good…..”

She sobs on me with no care for her image, and I am also very sad.

I want to comfort her, but I don’t have the energy.

The movement in the ward attracts the attention of people outside. The door opens and my older brother walks in urgently, eyes reddening when he sees me.

Behind him, I see Mingyi and Dr. Zhao.

Dr. Zhao is holding some sheets of paper, and looks a little tired. When he sees me awake, his eyes light up and he enters the ward.

They surround me, but Mingyi only looks at me from afar. She lowers her eyes and leaves. As she walks into the hallway dressed in dark gray, her tall figure looks lonely. I try to call out to her, but can’t make a sound.

My older brother comforts my mother and tells her to eat breakfast, but she refuses to eat, insisting on helping me drink some soup.

I actually have no appetite, but I don’t want to make her sad or worried, so when she feeds it to me, I try hard to drink it.

She seems to see my reluctance, and only feeds me two sips with reddened eyes, saying softly: “The doctor called last night and said there was a fire at your house and someone was taken away by ambulance. I thought the sky was falling…..” She pauses at this point, and I see her turn her head and rub the corners of her eyes. 

“Yesterday, your older brother and sister-in-law were still abroad. Fortunately, Mingyi came to pick me up. Thank goodness for Mingyi the day you fell unconscious.”

My throat is so sore that I can’t speak, so I try to reach out and hold her hand.

Her hands are still as soft and warm as they were when I was little.

She is stunned for a moment, then her expression softens and she touches my forehead with her other hand. “I don’t think your house is very auspicious. I’m thinking that when you’re discharged, you can come out and live somewhere, but it’s inconvenient for you to live with your brother and sister-in-law at home. I want you to buy a different house nearby.”

This time, it is my turn to be stunned. This statement makes me feel a little strange, but I’ve just woken up. My mind is unclear and I can’t think with clarity for a while.

Before I can think it through, Dr. Zhao comes forward to check on my condition and my older brother takes my mother to eat.

Dr. Zhao asks me some simple questions, and I am responsible for nodding or shaking my head. Then he prepares some medicine for me to take and asks the nurse to change me to a new IV.

The solution falls down drop by drop, and my arm feels cold. Before I fall asleep again, I see Mingyi.

She is standing beside me, looking down at me. Although she is a woman, the children in the Wen family are extremely tall. I even momentarily mistake her for Mingcheng.

I’m startled, but she just puts a hot water bottle next to my hand and covers my eyes with her palm.

I blink, feeling that this gesture is very similar to Mingcheng’s. This was the usual way Mingcheng comforted me to sleep. 

My vision goes dark and I fall asleep again.

I spend several days in the hospital like this. These few days are very peaceful. I haven’t lived such a peaceful life in a long time, without fear, anxiety, or self-doubt.

It’s like all I experienced in the past few days was a nightmare, and I’ve suddenly woken up from the dream.

The outside world is still lush and beautiful, and the people around me are chatting and laughing harmoniously. The world is calm and peaceful.

It’s as if that terrifying existence never appeared. Day or night, he never shows up.

I’m discharged from the hospital about a week later. I’ve burned down one floor of my house. Although property management has told me that the repairs are almost finished, I don’t want to go back at all, so I’m staying at my older brother’s house for the time being.

Although my heart is full of worry for Mingcheng, I really have no choice. This sort of matter is too separate from the reality of my life. I’m unable to sleep due to thinking about Mingcheng’s safety every night, but during the day, I can only be compelled to enjoy the peace of life.

I’ve received physical and mental therapy in a timely manner every day, and I feel much better. My life is so stable that I actually suspect it was all a dream.

Up until I find that my peaceful life is a bit strange.

More and more, I feel like it’s odd.

At last, I find the problem.

“Mom, there was a fire at my house. Why haven’t you asked about Mingcheng?”

At this time, my mom, sister-in-law, and I are preparing lunch. The two of them are talking and laughing. An entertainment show is playing on TV, and the atmosphere is cheerful.

Just after I finish saying this, their voices suddenly die away.

The TV is still making a lot of noise, but nobody in the house speaks.

I see them both turn their heads and look straight at me. This scene brings up unpleasant memories, and my heart suddenly tenses. “Mom…..Sister-in-law?”

My words seem to wake them up. My sister-in-law takes a paper towel to wipe her hands and calls to my mom. When my mom is called out, she opens her mouth as if she doesn’t know what to say for a moment. After a long while, she said hesitantly: “A-Zhen…..are you blaming us for not being concerned about Mingcheng?”

“How could I blame you? I just feel strange. In fact, I feel like there’s something wrong with him lately…..”

I feel that these things should be made known to my family members, because I am truly at a loss. I need others to believe in me so that I can get help.

But my mom is old, after all. I don’t dare tell her that Mingcheng has been replaced, so I tell her that I sense something wrong with him, as if he has become a different person.

I hope she thinks Mingcheng is possessed by an evil spirit, because my mom believes in Buddhism and has many friends in the circle. Maybe she will have some methods to deal with ghosts and evil spirits.

So I tell her what I can about the things going on at home.

But contrary to expectations, instead of believing that Mingcheng is possessed, she thinks I’m the one possessed.

“A-Zhen…..” She looks alarmed, and her eyes scan my face several times. Finally, she grabs my hand and says, “I’ll just say, your honeymoon to Southeast Asia was not auspicious at all, and your illness has gotten worse since you came back. Have you worn that pixiu that Mom got for you?”

I’m silent for a moment. “I wore it, but I accidentally broke it later.”

As for how it was broken, of course I dare not say.

But she turns pale with fright. “Master Wuye might be free in a couple of days. I’ll take you to see him.”

“Mom!” I was speechless. “I’m not possessed by an evil spirit, I’m telling you that Mingcheng is. Do you think Master Wuye can do something about it?”

“……You’re sure?”

I am very sure: “Yes.”

“If you have something to talk about, wait until after dinner. Mom, come over here and pick a piece of beef with me.”

My sister-in-law is an intellectual and advocates science. She probably doesn’t want to hear about someone being possessed, and calls my mom back to the kitchen.

While eating, I try to convince her. My mom listens and is indecisive for a moment: “A-Zhen, ah, before you went to the hospital, how long ago was it that you took the medicine Dr. Zhao gave you? How about Mom accompanies you…..”

“……”

I have no words!

“I’m not possessed, and I’m not sick either. Um…..what are you looking at me for? My illness isn’t serious.”

Under the eyes of my mom and sister-in-law, I ultimately change this sentence to: “I’ll go find Dr. Zhao after dinner, okay?”

Why don’t they believe me?

I’m really depressed, ah!

. . . . . . .

I feel a little disappointed that I didn’t get my mom’s acknowledgement. When I walk out of the room, I also hear my sister-in-law express her doubts about me: “Mom, Brother’s symptoms seem to be getting more serious…..”

They are my closest family members. I can’t help but get childishly angry when I fail to get their support, so I don’t want them to accompany me, and I go to see Dr. Zhao alone. Dr. Zhao is a professional. He will believe me.

“I don’t believe you.” He adjusts his glasses with a tired expression. He must have spent a lot of time taking care of me these days. “How long has it been since you’ve taken medicine?”

“I…..have a reason.” I try to explain it to him. After all, who can find out that their family member has been replaced and still take medicine and live peacefully?

But he doesn’t accept it, and raises his hand to interrupt me with a serious look in his eyes. “A-Zhen, you have also received higher education. Where do ghosts and monsters come from in this world? And did you know that I discovered you were having visual hallucinations in the hospital? Did you realize it yourself?”

I freeze in my seat. These words are like a bolt from the blue to me.

I’ve always thought I was close to recovery, and never expected that this would happen.

This state of affairs not only means that my illness is getting worse, but also that…..no one will believe me.

Even my mother and doctor don’t believe me. Nobody will ever believe me again!

“A-Zhen, did you really see all the things you spoke of?” 

“I did, it’s true!” 

I grab his hand, and my tone is extremely affirmative. I hope he believes me.

But he only looks at me for a moment, and then tells me a story.

Before Dr. Zhao was hired by Mingcheng as my exclusive doctor, he was the vice president of a well-known psychiatric hospital.

In the last period of time before he left his job, he took on a patient.

This patient was a very gentle woman. Her symptoms were very mild and her family didn’t think she was sick, so they didn’t want to get her treatment. They made a big fuss in the hospital and asked for her to be discharged to prepare for her pregnancy.

“But soon after she was discharged, a fire broke out in her home.” Dr. Zhao raises his eyelids and looks at me. The whites of his eyes are bloodshot, and there are shadows under them from fatigue. “This female patient burned down her home and claimed that she had strangled a monster to death.”

When I hear this, I feel my hair stand on end. Not because of horror at this patient, but because of what I associate with it.

“……So what was the truth?”

“The truth is that she was hallucinating. She thought her frail husband was a goat spirit, so she strangled him to death in order to get rid of the monster.”

I slump in the chair and don’t speak for a long time.

I think I understand why Dr. Zhao insists on coming to deliver medicine to me even after midnight. Even though I am the only patient he is taking care of, he seems to have aged several years in a short period of time.

Their doubts about me are well-founded.

And I……

Dr. Zhao gives me the medicine he prepared for me: “I’m telling you this to let you know that hallucinations are dire. You haven’t had any particular symptoms over the years. I’ve done various tests on you during the past few days when you were hospitalized and found nothing. It cannot be ruled out that the hallucinations are caused by something other than mental factors, but you still must take your medicine on time and keep your imagination from running wild. After three more days of observation, I will take you to get a brain CT scan.”

I don’t continue to insist. Raising my head, I drink the water he gives me and swallow the pills.

But I don’t listen to him honestly this time either.

I might really be ill, but I have my own reasoning and feel that I can trust myself.

He sends me back to the door of my older brother’s house. After saying goodbye to him, I don’t go inside. Instead, I turn around and take a taxi.

Finally, I arrive at someone’s home. The auntie is surprised to see me and says: “You haven’t been here in a long time.”

I force a smile and answer her with a nod. Sitting on the sofa, I wait for the person I want to see.

Previously, apart from facing Mingcheng, I never had any strange fantasies or saw strange things. If this was my mental illness, would it be so selective?

I believe in myself, even though no one else does.

The auntie pours me a glass of iced orange juice, but I don’t drink it even until the ice cubes melt. I finally meet the person I want to see.

At 5:30 in the afternoon, the door opens.

Mingyi is back.

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Chapter 15 << Table of Contents >> Chapter 17