There are good people and bad people in this world, but most of them are difficult to judge. 

I used to think that Wen Mingcheng was a gentle and tender man, but later found out that this was not the case. A lot of what he did was beyond my expectations, but people are inherently incapable of looking closely at something they can’t bear. Perhaps he was like that too.

I was with him firstly because he loved me, and secondly because he was a good person.

Now, I have doubts about whether he was such a good person. Did he love me?

Of course he loved me a lot in the eyes of others, but what about in my eyes?

I’ve been thinking about it for a long time these days. Quite a lot.

I tried to ask him in my dreams, but he just looked at me without answering.

I can’t help but dwell on the half of my life I spent with him.

When we were children, we played childish games and roughhoused, and our hearts were moved by the beautiful emotions of the young. We held hands and blushed with palpitating hearts, fell in love young in a foreign country, and later married.

Together we experienced the cool spring, hot and luxurious summers, the refreshing autumn sun, and the cold, chilling winters.

I heard his heartbeat, looked into his eyes, and felt his hair passing through my fingers.

From the age of ten to nearly thirty, his appearance reflected the passage of time. I appreciated the flowers he planted and felt the changing of the seasons. I slept in his arms and felt him day after day, witnessed his life and death and understood how unpredictable life is.

He participated in the first half of my life, and I walked with him throughout it.

It is difficult to see through the human heart, but feelings are the hardest to hide. If anyone can truly tell whether he loved me or not, I am the only one who can besides him.

I know he loved me.

. . . . . . .

“This is Master Mei Yin. A-Zhen, come and greet the master.”

My mother leads me to a suburban courtyard, where I meet a mage who is said to be able to help me recall the souls of the dead.

A middle-aged man wearing loose, gauzy white robes sits on a futon. When he hears my greeting, he raises his head and smiles at me.

He is quite old, and has many fine lines on his forehead and at the corners of his eyes, but his features are kind and there is nothing uncomfortable about the way he looks at people.

He is dressed like a monk, but I doubt he is a monk, because he has short hair.

But this is not important. What is important is whether or not he can help me recall the souls of the dead.

“Have you brought everything?” He looks me over from top to bottom before speaking.

“I brought it.” I carry the box forward, opening it in front of him. Inside are some of Mingcheng’s clothes from when he was alive, pictures of us as children, and our wedding rings and wedding pictures.

He checks these things one by one. About half an hour passes, and then he raises his head and looks at me.

His eyes are like ice and snow melting after being exposed to the sun, with a very tranquil warmth.

“It is not difficult if you simply want to recall the soul of the deceased.”

I don’t know if what he’s saying is true, but this sentence makes me happy. “What do I need to do?”

But he smiles and shakes his head. “The soul of the deceased needs to have the name and identity of a living person when he returns to the world, but these are already occupied now, aren’t they?”

This sentence makes me pause, and I look at him in disbelief.

He knows there is an imposter.

In fact, I didn’t really believe in recalling the souls of the dead before this. In other words, I didn’t fully believe that someone would have this ability, but even if he was a charlatan, I would still be willing to comfort myself in my brief free time during the day.

But his words truly give me hope. My hands on my knees begin to shake uncontrollably. Although I don’t know if he is a monk or not, he is wearing a Buddhist cassock, so I clasp my hands and beg him, “Yes, please help me and my loved one!”

He doesn’t agree immediately, but motions for my mother to leave first.

My mother hesitates for a moment, but sees my eager appearance and leaves.

After she leaves, Master Mei Yin stands from the futon. He takes a few leisurely steps before me and says to me after a few minutes: “The existence that occupies your husband’s place is different from ordinary dead souls. Logically speaking, it cannot be sent away, but it is not completely impossible. It’s only that, if it fails…..”

“Your soul will leave your body within a few short days. In short, you will die. Do you dare?”

Do I dare?

In fact, I’m really just an ordinary person who longs for simple happiness, but I have experienced the deaths of two close loved ones in this life. I was still young when my father died. After he was gone, my family lost its protection. Later, Mingcheng always protected me, and after he died, I lost my happy life.

What else can I be afraid of?

I answer him firmly: “Please help me.”

About an hour later, I sit in a windowless room, holding a long black awl in my hands.

With me in the center, there is a circle about four meters in diameter with red strips of cloth and white candles. I wear Mingcheng’s clothes on my body, and his birth date is written all over these clothes in my blood.

Master Mei Yin wears red and black ceremonial clothing and dances a strange and abnormal dance around me with his feet bare.

It is like an ancient sacrifice, and I hear murmured words coming from his mouth.

“……Yin and Yang, Eight Trigrams, Qian Radical, Xun and Kun…..”

“If the open fire does not alight, the dark water will return to the pond…..”

The burning candles are extinguished one by one with deer tears mixed with cinnabar, and a strange smell fills the air.

I don’t know how much time has passed when he suddenly stops the ritual dance. He takes out a dark black snake from his sleeve, then feeds the blood he had obtained from cutting my wrist in advance into the snake’s mouth.

Then I watch him kill the snake with a knife, and the blood spurting out of the snake’s body extinguishes the last candle.

At this moment, the wind begins to rise in the windowless room.

The wind stirs up a thick black mist, flooding everything like a tide. Gradually, the figure of Master Mei Yin slowly vanishes, and I can only see the things within the circle of red strips of cloth.

The sound of footsteps slowly approaches from far away.

It is the sound of men’s leather shoes hitting the ground.

I know this voice.

“You came.”

The man behind smiles, his voice without warmth. “How could I not come after all this trouble? You don’t actually have to go through so much trouble if you want to see me. We see each other every day, don’t we?”

I squeeze the long awl in my hand. It is cold, and so are my hands.

Master Mei Yin told me to pierce his heart with it and kill him. As long as I can successfully kill him, Mingcheng can come back. But we both know it will be difficult. I can’t kill him, but I still chose this method.

He goes down on one knee beside me and puts an arm around my shoulders. The other hand grips my hand holding the long awl. His tone is very sad. “You see, this is always how you are. You are obviously very weak, but always so stubborn. You stubbornly love that person, you’re stubbornly against me, and stubbornly unwilling to let yourself go.”

His fingers tap the long awl in my hand. “Do you know what will happen if you fail to kill me?”

I know. “I will die.”

He says: “Do you think I will let you kill me?”

I smile: “No.”

The false smile on his face disappears in an instant, and his voice is extremely cold: “So you are seeking death?”

Even though I’m about to die, I don’t feel afraid. I actually smile and say easily: “I don’t know. I probably don’t want to die. I want to cherish this life, but every day, I don’t know what to do.”

The “person” next to me is silent for a long while. He stands up and walks to me, then leans down toward me. I see the pain and regret welling up in his eyes. “A-Zhen, if I hadn’t pushed you so hard, would you have still done this?”

“I don’t know.” I still say this, because I really don’t know, and it shouldn’t be the reason that is guiding me now.

He slowly kneels down before me and holds my face in his hands, looking at me. “Then, if I become what you like about him, no, I will be gentler than him. I will also learn the oil painting you enjoy and do the things you like with you. Will you……will you slowly accept me?”

This time, I don’t speak.

He looks at me deeply, as if he has received the answer he wants, and suddenly gives me a sincere smile. “A-Zhen, I won’t let you die.”

After saying this, he stands abruptly and stretches his hands toward the thick darkness outside the circle.

“Ah!”

A shrill scream suddenly stops midway. Then the wind once again starts blowing inside the room. The extinguished candle emits a weak flame and then goes out, repeatedly swaying in the wind.

His eyes begin to turn blood-red. His gaze is sharp, his appearance like an evil ghost, and his entire body is full of a murderous aura.

Horrified, I drop my awl and step forward to stop him. “I asked him to do this, don’t kill him!”

He turns back and gives me a solemn smile. “I’ll kill him and put his blood on you. Then you can get out of here.”

“No—”

The sound of breaking bones rings in my ears, and there is also the faint sound of struggling.

A person is dying.

He is determined to kill Master Mei Yin, but in the next second, he lets him go.

Because I kneel at his feet.

He seems stunned, and looks down at me with a rare confusion in his eyes.

Like a child who has done something wrong, he drops that person and takes a few steps back, then hurries forward. “A-Zhen…..”

I kneel on the ground. There should be no expression of grief on my face, but my tears fall like rain. “I know I can’t kill you, so I don’t want to kill you today. I can’t explain why I’m doing this. Maybe I have no way to deal with you. Only in this way will you listen to my opinions.”

He tries to pull me up, but I resist, so he kneels in front of me and looks at me.

“Go. I know you’re not an ordinary ghost. I’m sorry that you’re here because of me and Mingcheng. Go back to your homeland. If you leave me be, you’ll be considered successful and you won’t die. This can be considered as the best of both worlds.”

His palms hold my face, and my tears flow all over his hands.

When I raise my eyes again, I find that he is crying.

It is a very silent weeping. His face is extremely handsome, like a perfect but lifeless handicraft. Two lines of blood and tears flow from the corners of his eyes. Fearsome marks are etched into his white porcelain face, dripping from his chin to the ground.

“I can’t leave, A-Zhen.’

“Your soul is tied to my body. If I leave, your soul will immediately vanish.”

I am stunned. “What…..”

“Didn’t you notice? I can find you no matter where you are.”

His hand moves to my back, pulling me close, and then he slowly lowers his head and gently presses his forehead against mine.

“I used to like the connection between us. I used to think you were uniquely mine, but I didn’t expect that I would be overly conceited and push you to this point.”

“I’m sorry. I became jealous when I saw you paying respects to his portrait.”

He kisses my eyes and whispers: “I can’t leave, but it’s not impossible to get rid of me.”

I watch him take a black doll out of nowhere.

The doll is exquisitely made, with various ancient sacrificial inscriptions and complicated patterns covering its body. On its head are long-lost pure Eastern pearls.

The Black Nanjia.

He never let me find it, so I gave up. Now, he takes it out himself.

“The fake monk’s skills are limited, and I have no heart. The deer blood awl cannot kill me, but it can kill it.”

He places the long awl back into my hand, holding the awl-bearing hand pointing it at the Black Nanjia. He raises his eyebrows and smiles at me. “This is my medium in the world. If you stab it, I will disappear and never be able to haunt you again.”

I raise my eyes blankly and look at him, and I’m stung by the soft smile in his eyes. I have only seen this look in Mingcheng’s eyes. This is an emotion that only a lover can have.

And over the long years, I had accidentally caught Mingcheng gazing at me like this many times, and I can confirm that this person loves me.

I suddenly feel a sharp pain in my heart, and can’t stab down with the awl no matter what.

He is not my Minghceng. I still don’t know what he is, but he knows what it’s like to love someone, so the love in his eyes still hurts me.

“You’re hesitating.” I see his sincere smile again. Curved eyebrows, slender eyelashes, tenderness.

“Don’t forget me,” he says.

In the next second, he grabs my hand and abruptly stabs down.

The black doll is extremely sturdy, and the sharp point of the long awl shatters instantly when it pierces through.

But all of the candles around me suddenly rekindle.

A curtain of darkness rushes toward him, wrapping around his body and face. He lowers his hands to his sides and raises his slender neck. His tall figure is submerged in the darkness, as if he is being eaten away by it.

I suddenly reach out to him and want to call his name, but then I remember that he has no name at all, and my hands only grasp air.

The darkness vanishes, and so does he.

I remain sitting here. The tears on my face are cold.

And the middle-aged monk gets up again, singing with a hoarse voice.

“The darkness is gone, the dead are resurrected…..”

“The dead soul returns—”

At the same time, I hear an urgent cry.

“A-Zhen—”

I recall where I first heard that cry, in a violent collision between two cars. At the critical life or death moment, the person beside me cried out and protected me firmly.

From then on, life and death were only a thin line apart.

I suddenly turn around: “Mingcheng!”

——-

The Author Has Something to Say:

Don’t worry, there will be a happy ending, and no one will die except the father-in-law.

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Chapter 27 << Table of Contents >> Chapter 29