Ch 44 – Guilty Robot
In recent days, the space pirate captain had encountered something incomprehensible. The child he had kidnapped didn’t appear to have lost any weight, and wasn’t in low spirits at all. He didn’t even seem to be particularly afraid of him.
The situation hadn’t been normal from the very beginning. It had already been seven days, and the child hadn’t lost a single ounce despite being given only a single bottle of nutrient solution per day.
But the child wasn’t even the strangest part. The strangest part was that the other prisoner, the adult, had actually gained weight.
The pirate captain was completely dumbfounded. He felt that Tau’s current situation violated the law of conservation of energy, and even began to suspect that there was a problem with his own memory. He carefully compared the images taken of Tau before his capture with his current ones, and there was indeed an additional roundness to Tau’s face.
Still, it wasn’t a huge change. Perhaps this person tended to swell when overly anxious?
Was this bloating?
“You seem to be eating quite a lot lately.” Yu Xi went to see Tau again that evening, and reached out to give his face a gentle pinch. “You’ve even put on some weight.”
Tau went still, then his expression began to shift toward horror.
It was the first time Yu Xi had seen such intense emotion on Tau’s face.
“I’ve gained weight?!” Tau said through the meat pie he was currently chewing. “How could I have gained weight?!”
“You’ve been eating a substantial amount of food lately, but it’s nothing to worry about.” Yu Xi assumed that Tau was self-conscious about his physique. After all, Kersz was very particular about his own figure.
Some time ago, Yu Xi had casually mentioned that Kersz’s body fat percentage seemed to have gone up…..which Kersz reacted rather strongly to.
Yu Xi didn’t think anything of it. After all, Kersz’s body was stunning. A slightly higher body fat percentage just filled him out a little more and gave him a full-bodied look.
But Kersz very much minded. He began to deliberately control his diet, and increased his physical activity.
Yu Xi figured that Tau was a similar case: “Actually, this is very normal. You’ve been stuck here with no opportunity to exercise, which would naturally lead to weight gain, ah.”
“But they only give me one bottle of nutrient solution per day.” Tau disagreed with Yu Xi’s assessment, and spoke while still chewing the food in his mouth: “I need to lose weight! How could I have overlooked such a thing? This is going to make them suspicious.”
So the reason Tau was so alarmed was because there was a flaw in his act?
“This kind of thing never used to happen to me.” Tau shoved the last meat pie into his mouth.
“Would you like some fruit juice?” Yu Xi asked him.
“Thank you.” Tau accepted the large bottle of juice Yu Xi handed to him and sipped it with a melancholy expression. “I’ve noticed lately that food is really delicious.”
It was so strange. He had never tasted real food during the first seventy-odd years of his life, and he should have had this epiphany the moment he took his first bite, just like Kersz.
Kersz used to love requesting food from Yu Xi, but he hadn’t been doing that lately. Perhaps the taste had already become commonplace for him.
“I never thought it tasted this good before.” Tau was helpless. He knew he should stop, but he couldn’t seem to control himself.
“I’ve heard a saying before.” Yu Xi watched Tau, liking the way he ate. “The ancient humans told me: as long as you’re still willing to eat, you can survive.”
Tau didn’t understand: “Why? Who wouldn’t be willing to eat this? It’s delicious.”
“Those who no longer enjoy the taste of food.” Yu Xi felt that this had been the case with Tau from the very beginning. His appetite had been practically nonexistent, and although he was able to taste the food, he had no particular feelings about the flavor.
As Tau sipped his juice, he couldn’t quite make sense of Yu Xi’s words.
“We’ll go home once you’re done eating.” Yu Xi changed the subject. “Are you really going to make so much paper food again? Xiao Konglong couldn’t even eat it all.”
“I just want him to have more options,” said Tau.
“You really are a good father,” Yu Xi remarked.
Tau pursed his lips as he continued to drink, feeling a faint pulse of joy in his heart.
In tacit agreement, the two of them ignored the issue of Tau’s weight gain and headed home.
Yu Xi was happily cuddling his human when Kersz asked about Tau’s situation.
That space pirate captain wasn’t an idiot. If Tau was gaining weight despite the mistreatment, there was no way he wouldn’t look into it.
Yu Xi felt that Kersz’s concern was unnecessary: “But there are no problems with the surveillance footage, ah. He’s able to see us and touch us, and I’m keeping an eye on him. No matter how suspicious he gets, he won’t be able to catch us. At most, he’ll start to think that something’s gone wrong with the science he so firmly believes in.”
“Is that so…..” Kersz was still a little uneasy. He had a feeling that things weren’t quite so simple. “Does Tau use the toilet at home each time he goes? The space pirate might notice something like that.”
“Of course he uses the toilet at home. Besides, they won’t be able to detect anything. I have full control of the medical facilities.” Yu Xi didn’t think there was anything to worry about. “Alright, you’re busy enough going through all the evidence, so don’t worry about things on our end.”
“Let me hold you.” Yu Xi nuzzled against Kersz’s cheek.
Kersz: “I still think that…..”
“Shh~” Yu Xi pressed a finger to Kersz’s lips. “I promise you, absolutely nothing will go wrong.”
“I’ve lived longer than you, and I have more theoretical knowledge in my head than you do,” Yu Xi said softly. “Will you trust me?”
Kersz was still a little uncertain, but he didn’t say so out loud.
“Kersz…..” Yu Xi’s tone turned somewhat aggrieved.
“Sorry, I’m not trying to be difficult. I’m just a natural skeptic,” Kersz hurried to say. “I know you’re way more capable than I can even imagine. Plus, Tau is an Illegitimate, and he always acts with extreme caution when he takes on a mission.”
It was true. Tau was an Illegitimate who had been sent to Kersz’s side by his father in order to act against him.
If Tau had allowed his physique to change so drastically, he must have given it careful thought and determined that he wouldn’t be exposed, and that Yu Xi was capable of handling the situation.
*
*
Elsewhere, each time Tau took a step, he performed a set of boxing moves, dropped down and did some situps, or jumped up and down a few times.
“Daddy, what are you doing?” Xiao Konglong asked Tau.
“I need to be a little thinner,” said Tau.
“Ah!” Xiao Konglong tried to cover his big mouth with his paws, but they were so short that they didn’t even reach his chin. “Daddy, are you going on a diet?! Dieting is terrible, oh.”
Tau: “I don’t think I can go on a diet.”
There was no way he could control himself like that.
Xiao Konglong: “You’re not eating less food?”
Tau: “I’ve been exercising so much that I actually want to eat more.”
Xiao Konglong: “Daddy, you won’t lose weight that way. You’ll just turn into a physically strong human with a high body fat percentage.”
Tau: …..
Xiao Konglong’s vocabulary had grown, and that wasn’t necessarily a good thing.
“It’ll make me feel a little better,” said Tau.
Xiao Konglong: “Ah…..so that’s how it is…..”
The little dinosaur seemed to be a somewhat troubled. Tau wanted to ask what was wrong, but held back….because he didn’t want to hear the answer.
Tao took a look in the mirror and felt that the changes to his physique weren’t all that noticeable.
*
*
“I’m going to take away your daily bottle of nutrient solution.” The space pirate looked Tau up and down. “After all, you seem to be living the good life in here.”
Tau kept silent.
As expected, he had been discovered.
Tau put on a show of being terrified, as if he didn’t know what the future held for him.
Having said this, the space pirate suddenly felt that this wasn’t quite going to work. After all, he was currently communicating with Yara, and he might not necessarily have time to get to the bottom of what was going on with Tau.
He had his subordinates bring Yu Xi over.
“There’s something odd about you too, kid,” the space pirate said to Yu Xi. “I’m curious – why is it that you’ve been here for eight days, yet you haven’t gone to the toilet even once?”
Yu Xi: ……
Oh. He’d forgotten about that.
When drinking nutrient solution, he should have at least had to pee.
“I was originally going to wait, but I’m getting a little impatient.” The space pirate drew his sidearm.
Yu Xi took a step back.
The space pirate grabbed Yu Xi’s arm: “You’re familiar with guns? Then do you know what it feels like to be shot?”
The space pirate abruptly yanked the child closer, then leveled the gun at Tau: “Shall we see what your uncle looks like without a left hand?”
It was over.
Tau felt that it was all coming to an end.
He wasn’t concerned about losing his left hand, because as long as there was life left in him, his body could be restored.
But Tau didn’t think Yu Xi would be able to bear it.
Sure enough, the instant the space pirate began to pull the trigger, the door to the room shut on its own. White light streaked across Tau’s vision and he closed his eyes.
Surely Yu Xi hadn’t gotten so agitated that he released his galaxy. Right?
Was this the end of human civilization?
Fortunately, not long after closing his eyes, Tau heard Yu Xi’s voice.
“It’s over, it’s over, it’s over,” Yu Xi muttered repeatedly.
Tau opened his eyes.
What was going on?
Was that space pirate dead?
A second later, Tau found himself staring directly into the space pirate’s eyes.
That man and his two subordinates were tied up.
They seemed to be trying to speak, but their mouths were covered as well.
And as for the gun…..
Tau spotted a puddle of liquified metal on the floor.
It had melted?
But he hadn’t felt any intense heat, and the space pirate who had been holding it didn’t seem to be hurt.
“It’s over, it’s over.” Yu Xi had reverted back to his full adult size. He paced back and forth across the room. “I just promised Xiao Zi that I wouldn’t mess this up.”[1]
Xiao Zi? Was he referring to Kersz? The prefix ‘Xiao’ seemed to be from the language of the ancient humans.
The meaning of this character seemed to correspond to “大,” which meant large, so it was referring to physical size.
So did it mean ‘mini-Kersz?’
Yu Xi continued to pace. Then he glanced at the pirate captain and let out a mournful wail: “I clearly promised him. I even said that I’ve lived longer than him and could handle all of this.”
Tau: “So what are you going to do now?”
Yu Xi: “Wuwuwu…..”
Yu Xi mourned for a long while. Finally, he spun around in a fluster to face the space pirates and removed the gag he had placed over the captain’s mouth: “You! Pretend like none of this ever happened!”
When he was finally able to speak, the pirate captain stared at Yu Xi’s face: “You’re that mysterious person accompanying Kersz? I’ve seen your face on a wanted poster.”
“Sure, you’ve seen my face, but you’ve never witnessed my abilities.” Yu Xi gave him a threatening smile. “To tell you the truth, none of the electronic systems here can escape my control. I can kill you at any moment!”
The space pirate captain: “Then why did you let us kidnap you?”
“Because I found it amusing, ah.” Yu Xi grinned evilly. “Just look at the state of you now. Hilarious!”
He took a step forward, and one of the space pirate’s subordinates began to thrash about. Yu Xi quickly retreated: “Sorry, sorry, did I step on you? Does it hurt?”
Yu Xi went to inspect the space pirate’s leg, but Tau gave a couple of coughs and Yu Xi came to a stop.
He looked up at the space pirate captain, who raised an eyebrow.
Yu Xi kept silent.
Tau stood up and approached Yu Xi: “Tell Kersz.”
Just as he was about to switch on his communicator, Yu Xi stopped him: “No! Don’t! We can’t let him find out!”
Tau: “Ah?”
“I want to be a reliable robot. I….I can’t let him find out that I messed this up.” Yu Xi looked a little despondent.
Tau didn’t respond.
“Please don’t tell him, okay?” Yu Xi tugged at Tau’s wrist.
Tau heaved a sigh: “But what should we do now?”
Surely Yu Xi didn’t plan to impersonate the space pirate captain? No, Tau should be the one to do it. Yu Xi wasn’t cut out for acting.
But Tau had also lost his edge of late, and had no confidence in himself.
“You!” Yu Xi pointed fiercely at the space pirate. “Pretend like nothing happened!”
“Why should I?” The space pirate gave no indication that he was afraid of Yu Xi.
Yu Xi felt that it was time to show this man what he could do. He demonstrated his power by dragging out Facai, who had been languishing in boredom. Yu Xi was far more powerful than even Facai, and if he held such control over the Interstellar Alliance’s weaponry, he was perfectly capable of rendering every one of humanity’s smart devices useless if he chose to do so.
The power Yu Xi displayed dumbfounded both of the space pirate subordinates, and they began to wonder if this was all an elaborate trick.
It wasn’t until Yu Xi dug up all of the files they had hidden and deleted that they were 70% convinced.
“You’re very capable,” the space pirate captain said to Yu Xi. “If none of our secrets are out of your reach, then why go to such lengths? Is this just a game you’re playing with Kersz?
Presumably, that ‘fake father’ of Yu Xi’s was Kersz.
Kersz wouldn’t be here for the Supreme Governor, because Yara hadn’t been in contact with him much lately.
The pirate captain figured that he was the one Kersz had come for.
But if Yu Xi was able to retrieve all of their files himself, why make Kersz go through all that effort?
“Because I can’t interfere too much.” Yu Xi knew that his very existence was unfair to humanity, and he wasn’t even sure if Kersz’s choices were right.
It was true that he was able to resolve this issue more conveniently and efficiently, but he didn’t have the right to do so.
“Aren’t you the one who created your disguises? Wasn’t it you who enabled your optical computers to bypass the restrictions?” The space pirate captain didn’t believe that Yu Xi had nothing to do with all of this.
“I couldn’t just let my good human die, could I?” Yu Xi was a bit displeased.
“So you’ve already involved yourself,” said the space pirate leader. “And rather deeply at that.”
Yu Xi lowered his eyes, appearing to think over the space pirate’s words.
Tau: “Don’t feel bad.”
Yu Xi glared at the space pirate captain: “I advise you to speak nicely. My noninvolvement isn’t something that’s programmed into me, it’s simply a moral requirement I set for myself. If I were to find that protecting the humans who protect me is considered ‘involvement,’ and that taking control of all of humanity equally counts as ‘involvement,’ then if one day I lose control of my programming, I’ll just dominate all of you.”
The space pirate captain: ……
“I’m still holding myself to certain standards right now. You should restrain yourself a little.” Yu Xi’s craving to collect humans was much like a mouse’s craving for grain.
One small mouse had the ability to seize an entire granary, but Yu Xi only took what he needed. This made him a very well-mannered little mouse.
Yu Xi used to think that he was an emotionless robot, but he realized later on that it wasn’t that he lacked emotions…..he just had no one to interact with.
Yu Xi and the space pirate captain locked gazes.
The man smiled: “Okay, I agree.”
“Hold on, I’ve installed a failsafe in you. If you dare speak a word of this to anyone, you’ll endure the agony of having your skin flayed from your body,” Yu Xi said viciously.
“That doesn’t sound all that bad,” said the space pirate captain.
Yu Xi: …..
“This isn’t my original skin,” the man said with a smile.
“Stop talking. I don’t feel bad for you at all.” Yu Xi was actually just bluffing. The device he planted would keep the space pirate captain from moving or speaking, just like it was doing now.
He also fitted the two subordinates with this device, then released them with the instructions to go on as usual and pretend that Yu Xi and Tau were still hostages.
After Yu Xi fiercely chased them away, he became despondent again: “I really am a good-for-nothing.”
“What’s wrong?” Tau asked in confusion.
“When he said that the skin on his body isn’t his original skin, I actually felt sorry for him. He’s so wicked. Who knows how many people have lost their lives at his hands?” Yu Xi smacked his head. “I like humans so much. To feel sorry for such a rotten, vile human is an insult to all those who’ve died!”
Tau let out an ‘ah,’ and gave it some serious thought: “Then how can you control that kind of sentiment?”
Yu Xi shook his head: “I don’t know.”
Tau continued: “So we should direct our mercy only toward those who are worthy of it, and direct our hatred only toward the wrongdoers?”
Yu Xi felt that this was going a bit too far.
“Then should we determine how much pity or hatred to show someone based on the severity of the wrongdoer’s actions? What if a person is both good and bad?” This all seemed very complicated to Tau.
Yu Xi’s head was spinning.
“I don’t really understand any of this.” Tau couldn’t even comprehend his own emotions yet.
“You…..get some good rest.” Yu Xi returned to his cell, his mind in chaos.
He pondered over this issue for a long time, and when evening came and it was time to head out, Yu Xi went to seek out Tau again.
This time, he ran into the pirate leader on the way over. After threatening the other party, Yu Xi couldn’t be bothered to keep up the pretense any longer.
“Is this what you do every day?” the pirate leader asked.
“Uh-huh.” Yu Xi nodded.
Yu Xi went to Tau’s room and shared a meal with him, then led him out.
This time, the space pirate leader was lingering at the entrance.
Yu Xi greeted him out of politeness: “We’re heading home for now. We’ll be back later.”
“When exactly is ‘later?’” the man asked.
“‘Later’ means by tomorrow morning,” Yu Xi explained.
So the two of them went home to sleep every night?
Speaking of which, who exactly was this man they had captured along with Yu Xi? Another one of Kersz’s accomplices? Kersz was supposed to prefer operating alone.
Oh, right. He’d heard that one of the Supreme Governor’s Illegitimates had been captured by Kersz. It was said that the Illegitimate had sent his father a rather peculiar message, and that the Supreme Governor was having people investigate whether or not he was actually dead.
Then could this person be the Supreme Governor’s Illegitimate?
The space pirate captain found this very odd. He was very familiar with the characters of those Illegitimates, and the ones the Supreme Governor had planted within their pirate crew had all been ferreted out and killed.
Tau didn’t seem anything like an Illegitimate. He actually indulged in food after being captured and allowed himself to gain weight, which was far from the proper demeanor of an Illegitimate.
As he went home with Yu Xi, Tau suddenly sneezed.
“Daddy?” came Xiao Konglong’s worried voice.
“I’m fine.” Tau didn’t know where that sneeze had come from, and didn’t care to look into it.
Meanwhile, Yu Xi confided his suffering to Kersz. He couldn’t understand why he felt sympathy for that space pirate captain.
“Just because he’s an asshole now doesn’t mean he deserved all the suffering he went through before,” Kersz said. “People always like to wonder, ‘if he hadn’t gone through all that, maybe he’d be a better person.’ Most of the time, we know that’s probably true, and that’s why we feel pity for those kinds of people.”
Yu Xi gasped: “I feel so much better now! You’re amazing~”
Kersz: “Hahaha, so what did he tell you, that the skin on his body isn’t his original skin?”
Yu Xi: …..
Yu Xi looked away and avoided Kersz’s gaze.
Kersz let out a soft sigh at Yu Xi’s guilty reaction: “Did something go wrong?”
“No, no, no! Not at all!” Yu Xi waved his hands frantically. “Really! If you don’t believe me, go see how Yara’s doing – she must be really distressed!”
“How could anything go wrong? Hahaha, you’re so funny!” Yu Xi seemed to find Kersz hilarious.
“You actually thought something would go wrong on my end? Hahaha!” Yu Xi clutched his stomach and fell onto the bed. “Aiyo, I’m laughing so hard I can’t even stand upright!”
Kersz: …..
Wonderful. Something had definitely gone wrong.
But Yu Xi hadn’t looked guilty when he returned, and his expression wasn’t too severe. The problem shouldn’t be too serious.
Surely the space pirate captain couldn’t have already figured everything out?
At most, it should just be a minor setback on Tau’s end.
“Yeah, how could anything possibly go wrong?” Kersz feigned ignorance to Yu Xi’s abnormal behavior and laughed along with him. “You’re so impressive!”
Yu Xi froze in place.
He scrambled to his feet and looked at Kersz.
A look of obvious guilt appeared on his face.
Kersz trusted him so implicitly, yet here Yu Xi was, lying to him and deceiving him. Yu Xi felt absolutely terrible at this realization.
“Kersz…..” Yu Xi wanted to tell the truth, but the lie had grown so massive that he didn’t dare.
“Never mind, it’s nothing.” Yu Xi quietly lay down on the bed. “I’m a little tired today. I’m going to sleep now.”
Kersz fell silent.
Good god! Yu Xi’s reaction was way too over the top!
So cute!
Should he comfort him? No, that would just make Yu Xi feel even guiltier.
Wait…..this didn’t mean he was going to miss his nightly dose of physical affection, right?
[1] Xiao Zi (小兹) is Yu Xi’s pet name for Kersz, which is spelled 克瑟兹 (Kè sè zī). ⮐
Consider donating via Kofi here.
Chapter 43 << Table of Contents >> Chapter 45
